Friday, 10 January 2014

Causes of Divorce

Divorce is the termination of marriage between a husband and the wife from the legal responsibilities of the union. When a couple got married newly, they feel
very happy and see the marriage as paradise on planet, earth. The question is: does this marriage last the way it appeared to be from the onset? After years of togetherness, a lot of issues began to occur between the two and these problems may lead to divorce added to hatred.

There had been many students who had been friends for years with the hope of getting married in future. These friends see each other as the apple of each other’s eyes and believed they cannot do without each other. This at times distracts the students from their primary objectives for coming into institutions of higher learning, thereby graduating with poor grades.

The question is: if these two finally got married, does the marriage last long as they planned when they were in their institutions? The truth remains that in most cases the marriage ‘meets obstacles’ on the way notwithstanding the likeness the both showed to each other some years ago when they were still students. The bad occurrence, which may occur between the two, surprises many persons who knew how the two were relating when they were still students.

Causes of Divorce
Based on this write-up, the causes of divorce are infertility, faithlessness, pride, poor moral, irresponsibility and drug taking. These points are the major causes of divorce in married life. Many failed in their marriages and write a ‘quitting letter’ to their wives or husbands because of these factors.

Infertility: This has caused a lot of problems in the lives of the couples as no one fells happy when he or she bears no child. When a man has no child to call his own, he feels unhappy and depressed. This can result to misunderstanding between the couple and results to divorce. The man may feel the he is right and that the wife is the cause of the problem while the wife may feel the problem is because the husband did not live good life during his youthful age. It may result to serious quarrel and the husband sends her packing. The fault may be from the wife likewise from the husband and divorce from this kind of problem is usually due to lack of understanding. If they understand each other, they can meet medical doctor who will help them sort things out.

Faithlessness: It is the state of not being faithful to your partner. Lack of trust between husband and wife is one of the major causes of divorce in many families. When a wife cheats the husband and meets another man at his back, the man feels bad when he finds out. In the other side, if the woman is cheated she feels much pain for the bad action taken by the husband. She feels as if she does not have all it takes to make the husband happy. This in most cases leads to serious misunderstanding between the two. If the couple had already bear children, the children may learn this bad habit and transfer it to the future family. This then builds the ‘culture of divorce’ from generation to generation.

Pride: Simplicity is the best and pride leads to downfall and disaster. What do couples gain from raising shoulders? Many divorces that are incurred today are because of pride. This is seen between married persons with different academic qualifications. A wife may feel that she has Doctorate Degree while the husband only possesses Bachelors Degree. The wife may be proud of her qualifications thereby neglecting the functions she is to perform as a woman of the house. Due to this failure to perform her functions properly because of pride and much money she earns from her job may get the husband annoyed. When the pride continues to repeat itself, the man may ‘sacks’ the woman from the ‘office’ they work together i.e marriage.

Poor moral: Most of the problems we are having in the world of today are that of moral. The morality of most people that live on this planet is decreasing from day-to-day. People are losing moral practices and call it modernization of the new world. The principle of doing the right among married couple is growing cold as the world advances. Most men do not understand the right thing to do at the right time towards their wives. This kept on causing problems between the two and can result to divorce. Men should know the right time to demand for ‘something’ from their wives so that they will not see their wives negative response as depriving them of what is their right. Again, women on the other hand are to be wise on their own side. Married couples should be principled and train themselves morally to avoid divorce. 

Irresponsibility: This is the state of not being responsible. Oxford Advanced Learners Dictionary defined responsibility as the thing which one is required to do as part of a job, role, or legal obligation. When a man does not perform the functions he is to perform as a man of the family, the wife may get worried after the man repeats the bad manner on several occasions. Take for instance, if a man who is to give money for the family feeding does not do so, what do you expect if the woman had endured for a long time? When the woman experienced hunger for a long time, she may decide to quite from the marriage and go to her parent’s house where she will be fed well. She may even decide to leave the man and get another who will take good care of her.   

Drug taking: Taking substances that have stimulant effects on the person that takes it can lead to disunity in marriage. Hard drugs are capable of changing the behaviour of the person that ‘patronizes’ them. A husband may see it as being offensive when his wife takes such product. In the same vein, a woman may see taking of drug by the husband as offensive act. Whatever be the case, the truth is that this can continuously lead to argument which can lead to fight and finally ends up in divorce. Again, when a man goes out and take drug and report back to his family, it can make him to start behaving abnormally which can make him to beat the wife. When the wife is fed up with that kind of lifestyle, she may quite from the marriage.

What is your perspective on divorce? Do you think divorce is doing any good to the world of today or not? The truth remains that divorce is not good and is to be reduced to make the society a safe place for all. This write-up is on the causes of divorce among couples. The basic causes of divorce as discussed on this piece are infertility, faithlessness, pride, poor moral, irresponsibility and drug taking.

Causes of Divorce by Dr. Abigail Hirsch

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